Beaster Bunny/Transcript

Transcript
[gooey noises]

[gulping and slurping sounds]

[horror music builds]

[monster screech]

[cool opening credits music]

Edd: No peeking! I promise it's a great surprise.

Tom: [Gasp] You found my real parents!?

Edd: Even better!

Ta-da!

Tom: Oh... Right.

I understand why I wore a blindfold but making all of us wear them made getting here very hard...

That'll buff right out.

Edd: I'm gonna miss Tom's car...

Matt: Not me! It was bumpy, we were always late, and the running costs were outrageous!

Tom: Everyone's a critic!

Matt: And the smell! From now on I'm driving...

Edd: Guys, don't fight. There's plenty of eggs for everyone!

But mostly me...

Tom: Edd, this is for children. And by the looks of it very, uh...

Unique... special children.

Edd: Oh don't let them fool you! That's what they want you to think!

Tom: Aren't we a little old to get excited over-

Matt: FACE PAINTING!

Edd: Well, looks like it's just you and...

Yup, that makes sense.

Matt: Me, me, me, ME, ME!

Face-Painter: Okay, what are we doing today then?

Matt: BUNNY.

Face-Painter: Are you sure you wouldn't like one of the other options? I can do all sorts.

Matt: Bunny.

Face-Painter: Bunny it is.

The Mayor: Hey everyone, I'd like to welcome you to the annual easter egg hunt, and extend a personal thank you

to Mike, who was in charge of decorations this year and who quite clearly just

read the part of the brief that said 'Easter' in big letters

and just ran with that. Thanks.....

Mike: You're welcome!

The Mayor: That's sarcasm, Mike.

Mike: Okay!

The Mayor: Anyway- is everybody EGG-cited?

[awkward cough]

The Mayor: Who's ready to... get CRACKing?

Alright everyone, let's HOP to it! [chuckles]

Hank: Boo! You suck!

The Mayor: Hey! I know where you live-

Uhhh... valued constituent.

Hank: Get on with it!

The Mayor: Whatever. Three, two, one, go.

[trumpet sounds]

Park Lady: So, which one's yours?

Tom: None! I'm... alone. Yeah! In this park.

Full of children.

Drinking.

Wait-

Park Guy 1: Weirdo!

Park Guy 2: Weirdo!

Tom: No, you don't understand! I don't even celebrate Easter, I'm just here for them...

My friends.

[literal penny drop]

[concerned mumbling]

Tom: Who are adults!

Aww..

It's bad that you're still here, isn't it?

Park Creep: Oh yes.

[upbeat polka music plays]

Tom: Did you lose yet? Can we go?

Edd: Is that... a bunny?

Matt: Why yes, thank you for noticing!

Edd: No! BIG bunny...

Tom: Yeesss... big bunny.

Edd: No, huge! Giant! Grotesque! BUNNY!

Man in Bunny Costume: Awww...

Tom: Edd! That was really mean!

Proud of you, buddy!

[horror music plays]

Tom: Oh!

Ooohhh...

Oh.

Beaster Bunny: [monster screech]

Mark: Ahhh. You see, isn't it nice to get out of the house?

You can get some fresh air, and I can get over my irrational fear of rabbits...

Beaster Bunny: [monster screech]

Mark: AAAAAAHHHhhhh!

Eduardo: Aahh, oh no! A giant mutant ra- uh...

I- I'm sorry.

I just can't do this right now. I'm gonna go...

Beaster Bunny: [monster screech]

[action music resumes]

Beaster Bunny: [monster screech]

Security Guard: Save me, Super Guy!

[angelic choir]

Security Guard: Oh right...

Heeelp!

Super Lad: Golly gee jimmickers, Super G- I mean... Steve.

Did you hear something?

Super Guy: Yeah everything, all of the time.

ALL OF THE TIME.

Super Lad: Okay, I'm sorry... I just thought-

Super Guy: Oh I didn't realize I was talking to Think Boy!

Super Lad: It's Super Lad-

Super Guy: I'm sorry what was that?

Super Lad: Super Lad?

Super Guy: Just take the shot! Super Dingus...

[golf hole sound]

Super Lad: I won! Yay!

[controller snaps]

Super Guy: [scream]

[back to the action music]

Edd: Tom! The nog!

Tom: Edd, you're a genius! When it tears us limb from limb we won't feel a thing!

Edd: No.. I meant... Ah forget it, I'll do it myself!

EGG to meet you!

Male Trucker: They're going through this nog like there's no tomorrow! We need to step on it!

Female Trucker: This much concentrated nog in one place is dangerously unstable!

We'd better get there before the pressure reaches critical!

[alarms sounding]

Chester: Okay team, it's time to leave! Everybody in their proper places!

In you get Clarence, Daisy, Cassandra, Leonard, Choncey...

Hmm that's strange, where's Lyle?

Has anybody seen Lyle? LYLE!

Choncey? Hmmmmm?

Choncey: [little hiss]

Female Trucker: If we don't unload stat, the tanker will blow! We're looking at a nog-splosion that could flatten four city blocks!

Male Trucker: Just a little further baby... The town needs us!

Female Trucker: Bunny!

[huge truck crash noises]

[monster screech]

[fire spreading]

[giant explosion]

Matt: You could say they've got... egg on their face!

Edd: Son of a- [sigh] It was right there! Damn it!

Tom: Are we dead yet? Can we go?

Edd: I did it!

Matt: We did it, Edd. We saved the town-

Edd: I WON!

Tom: [sigh] I remember when you were the smart one...

[awesome credits music]

Matt: Nog today... Get the shell out of here... It's wabbit season...

Tom: Yolk's on you?

Edd: I get it okay!

[more awesome credits music]

Mike: Yes ma'am, threat neutralized. The asset has been secured.

[ominous drone]

[monster screech]